What is normal? Something which is routine. Who is normal? Well, technically all of us and none of us at the same time. Most of us, in hindsight, have a routine life. We wake up, do a set of tasks (it is upto you how exciting or mundane those tasks are) and go to sleep. The time we decide to do something spontaneous is to experience the adrenaline rush, which truly makes us feel alive. But what really does adrenaline deal with? Anxiety, anger and every kind of “abnormality”. Now this makes me wonder whether we actually want to be normal.
We often describe our body parts as something we own. “My” mind, “my” heart, “my” feelings. We do not say “I am my breath”. Instead, we say “ I am breathing”. We identify as the energy that is inside us. We do not relate to our legs but to our emotions because there are no emotions in our legs but they are in the core. In the same space of our body coexist our organs which we do not identify as and our emotions that we do. So after that observation it is kind of strange that we just want to neglect the closest relationship we have with anything or anyone. We start believing that a static emotion of feeling happiness in a dynamic body will give us eternal peace and fulfillment.
Human beings are known to be one of the most selfish beings, yet we somehow manage to treat ourselves the worst in terms of our mental well-being. People either expect too little or too much out of themselves. We either completely neglect ourselves and do not expect any repercussions that we will eventually receive with the constant inattention to our mental health or we tend to expect ourselves to always be happy and if we falter even a little bit, we often think that we have reached the rock bottom.
Healing yourself is not just drinking more water and telling yourself that you are happy, healing is the little space that you give yourself to breath, to just exist. To be satisfied and give yourself a pat on the back for doing a task. Healing is knowing your own limits and respecting your own boundaries. Healing yourself is knowing you can take things slowly and not rush into “fixing” yourself. You are not an object or a machine that just needs a little oiling and then will begin operating smoothly again. Although, if you still feel as if you want to be better and do not know where to start, let me suggest some solutions. Every negative feeling that you have inside you, write it down, share it with someone else or explain it to yourself verbally. If you let those feelings fester inside you for a long period of time, they will start chipping away a part of you bit by bit.
As much as it sounds like a Gen Z social media trend, start romanticising your life. At the end of the day you are the protagonist of your life. Be satisfied that you are doing what you like, be satisfied with the dissatisfaction you get from doing something you dislike. Every part of your emotion is a part of yourself, accept yourself. If you do not like the current, be happy that you are aware, you want to change, to be a better version, to be an idealized version of yourself. Your work, your school life, your relationships are parts of your life and not your entire life. Even if you are doing worse in one part of your life, be optimistic that you are doing better in the other part of your life.
I started this piece asking myself whether any of us want to be normal, whether I want to be normal and I have concluded that everyone is normal and abnormal at the same time. You are normal with the way you deal with your circumstances because you are the only one going through it at a particular time. You are normal for liking a niche band that nobody you know listens to. You are normal because you are you.